HOW TO TALK ABOUT SPIRITUAL STUFF
by Frank Majka, SJ

            Talking about “spiritual stuff” —  faith, life with God, the religious and spiritual aspects of life — can be intimidating, especially if people feel they don’t have a lot of practice at it and don’t want to sound silly or awkward. Nobody wants to be in a conversation where they don’t know what’s expected, what words to say, or what to talk about.  Yet people have a desire and need to talk about the spiritual dimension of their lives since it is an aspect that is just as important as any other. Fortunately, talking about one’s faith and spirituality is a skill that can be learned and learned very quickly, since it doesn’t require reading books or taking courses.  So how does one do it?

TALK ABOUT IMPORTANT  EXPERIENCES OF YOUR LIFE
            What events or experiences do you feel have been most significant to you because they affect you on a deep level?  They may be experiences you have had of  nature, of  friendships, when facing some challenge, waiting for something important, or when you have been in church.  They seem to stand out to you as more than just the ordinary experiences you have every day. There was something special about them, and you can still remember them. These are part of your spirit and, thus, your spiritual life.

TALK ABOUT YOUR HEART
            Your heart is a huge part of your spirit. It is God’s gift to you as much as is your mind. Some questions that reveal what is in your heart are the following. What things or people do you love?  What or whom do you hate? What or whom do you fear?  What or who makes you come alive, feel happy and excited, or makes you sad? When you talk about these things, you are talking about your heart.

TALK ABOUT YOUR VALUES
            Your values are the things that you think are important and the things that you stand up for.  Where have they come from? When have they been challenged? What strengthens them?  Have they changed? Are they clear or somewhat confused?

TALK ABOUT YOUR IMAGE OF GOD
            What is your picture of God?  What are the words you use to describe God?  What are you certain about when it comes to God, and what are you uncertain about?  Has your image of God changed in any significant ways?  What do you think God might think or feel about you?

TALK ABOUT YOUR PRAYER
            Do you pray? Where and when do you like to pray? Is going to church meaningful for you? Do you ask for things for yourself or for other people? Do you experience dry spells in your prayer? Is the way you pray now different from what it used to be?

TALK ABOUT YOUR FAITH STORY
            Where did your faith come from?  Is it like that of your parents or friends?  Has it always been part of your life or only sometimes?  Are you satisfied with it?  What has most challenged it?  What has most strengthened it? Are there things in the Scriptures that are especially meaningful or challenging for you, stories that you have always liked? What do you feel about the varieties and differences of religions?

            Talking about Spiritual Stuff is really not that complicated because you are talking about yourself.  You are talking about things that you are an expert on - your own life and experiences. No one can tell you “No, you don’t feel that way” or “That’s wrong! You didn’t experience that.”  Talking about your spiritual life (and listening to others talk about theirs) is tremendously rewarding and just takes the willingness to do it,  a little practice, and some other people who are willing to do it as well. You can even talk about your spiritual life when no one else is around by using a journal to express yourself. However you do it, talking about your spiritual life is a rewarding, enriching practice, well worth the effort.
                                                                                                                                        

©1998 Frank Majka, S.J.  Revised April, 2003